So You Want to Eat Like a Lion: A Beginner’s Guide to Going Carnivore

Step 1: Know Thy Meat

The first rule of carnivore: Meat is your best friend. And not just any meat. You’ll want to focus on fatty cuts like ribeye, pork belly, and ground beef. Lean meats like chicken breast are fine, but they’re like that one coworker who brings salad to a pizza party—not very helpful.

Pro Tip: Grass-fed, pasture-raised meats are great if your budget allows. But let’s be real: Costco ground beef can still get the job done.

Step 2: Purge Your Pantry

Take a hard look at your pantry. See that quinoa, the half-eaten bag of kale chips, and those “healthy” granola bars? Say goodbye. The carnivore lifestyle doesn’t leave room for “maybe foods.” If it’s not meat, eggs, or animal-based, it’s gotta go.

Make It Fun: Host a “Goodbye Carbs” party. Invite your friends over to take the snacks off your hands. Just don’t let them guilt you into keeping that jar of almond butter.

Step 3: Start Simple

When you’re new to carnivore, simplicity is key. Think of it as a meat-only honeymoon phase. Eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full, and don’t overcomplicate it. A day could look like this:

Breakfast: Eggs and bacon (aka, the holy grail of morning meals)🍳🥓
Lunch: A giant burger patty topped with cheese (ditch the bun, obviously)🍔
Dinner: A steak the size of your head🥩
Optional Snacks: Beef jerky, pork rinds, or a stick of butter if you’re feeling fancy.🐖

Step 4: Embrace the Awkward Transition

Let’s talk about the elephant in the room: your body might freak out a little when you first start. If you’ve been living off oatmeal and green smoothies, switching to an all-meat diet can feel like upgrading a Prius to a Monster Truck. Here are some things you might experience:

Keto Flu: Yes, even carnivores get this. Drink electrolytes and stay hydrated. (Translation: Salt your meat like it owes you money.)

Weird Bathroom Moments: Don’t worry; this, too, shall pass.

Meat Dreams: It’s a thing. Just go with it.

Step 5: Don’t Overthink It

You might feel the urge to Google every single thing about the diet. (“Can I eat shrimp on carnivore?” Answer: Yes.) But here’s the truth: Carnivore is about simplifying your life. If it comes from an animal, you can probably eat it.

The only rule? Avoid seed oils and processed junk like the plague. Butter is your friend, margarine is not.

Step 6: Tell Everyone (or Don’t)

Fair warning: When you start the carnivore diet, you’re going to get questions. Lots of questions.

“What about your fiber?”
“Aren’t you worried about cholesterol?”
“Isn’t this just Atkins without the salad?”

You can educate them if you’re feeling patient, or you can just shrug, take a bite of your steak, and say, “It’s working for me.”

Step 7: Stay Consistent

The beauty of the carnivore diet is that it’s both restrictive and liberating. You’ll save money on groceries (goodbye, overpriced “superfoods”) and time in the kitchen. But the key to success is consistency. Stick with it for at least 30 days and see how you feel.

Pro tip: Keep a food journal. Not to count calories—we’re not about that life here—but to track how you’re feeling. Spoiler alert: You’ll likely notice better energy, clearer skin, and fewer hangry moments.